So I've been thinking if i should get this blog up and running again,and the God's have spoken! This blog has now been REVIVED!
Facebook, for better or worse, is like being at a big party with all your friends, family, acquaintances and co-workers. There are lots of fun, interesting people you're happy to talk to when they stroll up. Then there are the other people, the ones who make you cringe when you see them coming. This article is about those people.
Sure, Facebook can be a great tool for keeping up with folks who are important to you. Take the status update, the 160-character message that users post in response to the question, "What's on your mind?" An artful, witty or newsy status update is a pleasure -- a real-time, tiny window into a friend's life.
But far more posts read like navel-gazing diary entries, or worse, spam. A recent study categorized 40 percent of Twitter tweets as "pointless babble," and it wouldn't be surprising if updates on Facebook, still a fast-growing social network, break down in a similar way.
Here are 12 of the most annoying types of Facebook users:
The Let-Me-Tell-You-Every-Detail-of-My-Day Bore. "I'm waking up." "I had Wheaties for breakfast." "I'm bored at work." "I'm stuck in traffic." You're kidding! How fascinating! No moment is too mundane for some people to broadcast unsolicited to the world. Just because you have 432 Facebook friends doesn't mean we all want to know when you're waiting for the bus.
The Self-Promoter. OK, so we've probably all posted at least once about some achievement. And sure, maybe your friends really do want to read the fascinating article you wrote about beet farming. But when almost EVERY update is a link to your blog, your poetry reading, your 10k results or your art show, you sound like a bragger or a self-centered careerist.
The Friend-Padder. The average Facebook user has 120 friends on the site. Schmoozers and social butterflies -- you know, the ones who make lifelong pals on the subway -- might reasonably have 300 or 400. But 1,000 "friends?" Unless you're George Clooney or just won the lottery, no one has that many. That's just showing off.
The Town Crier. "Michael Jackson is dead!!!" You heard it from me first! Me, and the 213,000 other people who all saw it on TMZ. These Matt Drudge wannabes are the reason many of us learn of breaking news not from TV or news sites but from online social networks. In their rush to trumpet the news, these people also spread rumors, half-truths and innuendo. No, Jeff Goldblum did not plunge to his death from a New Zealand cliff.
The TMIer. "Brad is heading to Walgreens to buy something for these pesky hemorrhoids." Boundaries of privacy and decorum don't seem to exist for these too-much-information updaters, who unabashedly offer up details about their sex lives, marital troubles and bodily functions. Thanks for sharing.
The Bad Grammarian. "So sad about Fara Fauset but Im so gladd its friday yippe". Yes, I know the punctuation rules are different in the digital world. And, no, no one likes a spelling-Nazi schoolmarm. But you sound like a moron.
The Sympathy-Baiter. "Barbara is feeling sad today." "Man, am I glad that's over." "Jim could really use some good news about now." Like anglers hunting for fish, these sad sacks cast out their hooks -- baited with vague tales of woe -- in the hopes of landing concerned responses. Genuine bad news is one thing, but these manipulative posts are just pleas for attention.
The Lurker. The Peeping Toms of Facebook, these voyeurs are too cautious, or maybe too lazy, to update their status or write on your wall. But once in a while, you'll be talking to them and they'll mention something you posted, so you know they're on your page, hiding in the shadows. It's just a little creepy.
The Crank. These curmudgeons, like the trolls who spew hate in blog comments, never met something they couldn't complain about. "Carl isn't really that impressed with idiots who don't realize how idiotic they are." [Actual status update.] Keep spreading the love.
The Paparazzo. Ever visit your Facebook page and discover that someone's posted a photo of you from last weekend's party -- a photo you didn't authorize and haven't even seen? You'd really rather not have to explain to your mom why you were leering like a drunken hyena and French-kissing a bottle of Jagermeister.DON'T EVER POST MY PHOTOS ON YOUR FACEBOOK!!
The Obscurist. "If not now then when?" "You'll see..." "Grist for the mill." "John is, small world." "Dave thought he was immune, but no. No, he is not." [Actual status updates, all.] Sorry, but you're not being mysterious -- just nonsensical.
The Chronic Inviter. "Support my cause. Sign my petition. Play Mafia Wars with me. Which 'Star Trek' character are you? Here are the 'Top 5 cars I have personally owned.' Here are '25 Things About Me.' Here's a drink. What drink are you? We're related! I took the 'What President Are You?' quiz and found out I'm Millard Fillmore! What president are you?"
So, are you one of them? Or perhaps more than one of them?
Stay far away from me,VERY far.
Facebook, for better or worse, is like being at a big party with all your friends, family, acquaintances and co-workers.
There are lots of fun, interesting people you're happy to talk to when they stroll up. Then there are the other people, the ones who make you cringe when you see them coming. This article is about those people.
We were both young when I first saw you.
I close my eyes and the flashback starts..
.. you're standing there.. on a balcony in summer air.
See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns.
Making my way, I'm moving through the crowd to say "hello.."
Little did you know..
.. that I was Romeo, as I was throwing pebbles..
.. heard your father say "Stay away from Juliet!"
Had to leave you crying on the staircase.. begging me "Please don't go!"
So I said..
Julie I'll take you somewhere we can be alone.
Just be patient.. nothing left to do but run.
You'll be the princess, I'll be the prince..
It's a love story baby say "Yes."
So you sneak out to the garden I'm hiding..
.. we keep quiet cause we're dead if they find me.
Close your eyes.
.. escape this town for a little while.
I was Romeo, you were my Juliet.
Even my father said loving you is not worth it.
Had to leave you on crying on the staircase.. begging me "Please don't go!"
So I said..
Juliet I'll save you, they'll never come between us!
Just hold on and love is gonna free us!
Don't be afraid, oh we'll make it through this!
It's a love story.. baby just say "Yes."
I'm sure she's tired of waiting.
Swear I'm on my way, just had to work some things out!
I hope her faith's not fading..
.. that was when I met her outskirts of town..
.. and I said..
Julie I apologize, didn't mean to scare you.
Need you more than anything.. I refuse to share you.
Saw it in her eyes, she didn't know what to think..
I knelt to the ground and I pulled out a ring..
"Marry me Juliet. You'll never have to be alone.
I love you and that's all that I really know!
I talked to our families, pick out a white dress..
.. it's a love story baby just say "Yes." '
Cause we were both young when I first saw you.